Friday, March 11, 2005


I'm going out of state, and I don't really have time to post right now, but I can't leave Ann Coulter's smug mug atop my blog for the whole weekend, and I had to say something about weddings. Not just any weddings, but the weddings of your oldest friends.

My oldest friend is getting married this weekend. We met in junior high. I was the smart geek, she was the badass. She is getting married this weekend, and it makes me think about how weird the things are that actually happen that you have always imagined. (Another weird thing is that sentence.) Whenever we pictured her wedding as kids (we didn't picture mine as often; I was a budding feminist at thirteen and who could say for sure if I was getting married?), there were always extravagant trappings and lots of let's face it rockin' 80's style bridesmaid dresses going on. Did Lita Ford play the reception? LA Guns? Maybe there was even a horse-drawn carriage--forgive me my friend if I have got the details wrong.

Seventeen years later (a whole, sentient, curfew-breaking person worth of later) I am headed through an imminent snowstorm to a small, I imagine elegant and very non-80's wedding at a manor in upstate New York. My friend is marrying a man with three kids, has possibly left the West Coast behind forever (that could actually be said of both of us), and she will become not only a wife tomorrow but a stepmother. It's all so amazing. I bet her soon-to-be stepkids would have liked the horse-drawn carriage thing, had it survived.

My point is: how the hell do we ever know what's going to happen? I actually ended up getting married myself, and even though I didn't have bridesmaids with burgundy velvet boots as once envisioned (or, for that matter, bridesmaids), I did have a winter wedding as originally planned circa 1988. It's just a little bit crazy to see the plans you make and then their real life counterparts. It's a fun game if you can stand the wait, and I guess it's a game we'll always play. What am I going to be when I grow up? (Most people I know still have no idea.) Are we all going to have kids? Will they all be unmanageable brats as I fear? Will we ever have those week-long reunions on tropical islands when we're senior citizens like I hope and pray we will? I guess we'll see. The wait's over on this particular round, and it looks like the turn came out pretty good. Way to go, MJC.


At 11:43 PM, Blogger charles.bukowski.costanza said...

just need to say that a) that one sentence was remarkable--not complicated, yet somehow confusing as fuck and i stared at it and couldn't think of a different way to write it, then decided i liked it b) i would love to have known you at 13, i'll bet you were a coy little smartypants and c) as much as i loved your wedding--and honestly it lives in my top-3-all-time, trumping several that i've been in--i realize now, after reading today's entry, that the overall FEEL would have been vastly improved with the wedding party in legwarmers. also some dashes of pink chiffon. just here and there.


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